So today is 12 dpiui and I woke up this morning around 5am and tested my urine. I got a big fat 'Not Pregnant' and came back to bed and cried. I just don't understand how things can be so wrong. What have I done to deserve infertility. I must have done something really bad that God is holding against me.
I fell asleep and got up to go to my vision appt. then went to the mall. Every stroller I saw or every pregnant women, I cried. I just sat there feeling low and like the smallest person in the world. I was not a good pick, I am barren and I cannot give my husband children.
Because I believe that God works miracles and He can do anything, I retested in the PM and got another 'Not Pregnant'. So that's that. No Happy Father's Day from me because I can't deliver. I am sure he'll be upset, but what can I do. Obviously this is out of my control and I just give up.
I am stopping the prometrium tonight and having a strong apple martini. I don't want to hear about Beta or later implanters. This just is what it is.
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1 comment:
Thanks for stopping by my blog. I am sorry that your IUI didn't work this time. I will keep you in my thoughts!
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